AS IF IT WAS THE LAST ONE

david, oscar
You must live life as if you were going to die tomorrow, get up and enjoy each day as if it were your last one. And with masturbation time, you must do the same, no different treatment. Treat it as if it were the last chance.

➡️ Let's do real, be real with Tantaly, the sex doll torso leader

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Ergonomic mousepad.

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THE MIRROR IS A DAMN LIAR

luzos, oscar, walter, david
The classic Snow White tale revolves around a magic mirror that always tells the truth about who's the fairest of them all. But now, with the new version starring Rachel Zegler as Snow White and Gal Gadot as the Evil Queen, everything goes straight to hell. Why? Because the mirror dares to claim Rachel is hotter than Gal—which literally no one believes. If there's one thing all guys worldwide agree on, it's that Gal Gadot is easily a thousand times sexier than Rachel Zegler.



So, how the hell does this happen? Here’s where the supposed philosophical symbolism kicks in: the mirror doesn't just measure physical beauty; it also values purity, goodness, and inner beauty. According to that logic, Rachel comes out ahead because she's supposedly got something Gal Gadot lacks in the film: a nobler, less envy-corrupted soul.

Bullshit! If Rachel Zegler has proven anything in recent months, it’s precisely how toxic, arrogant, and poisoned by cheap feminism her soul really is—oozing pretentiousness and superiority from every pore of her body.

The ideological trainwreck Disney has become in recent years finally hit rock bottom by casting someone like her to reboot one of the iconic stories from our childhood.

Therefore, I'm officially revoking all magical powers from that mirror, demoting it on behalf of the patriarchy, and hereby relegating its sole purpose to reflecting and holding suction cups.



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¡Que te jodan, Mickey Mouse!

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MASTURBATE. DO IT FOR YOUR HEALTH

walter, david
Back in 1994, a study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association explored the link between masturbation and urinary tract infection prevention in women. The result? Women who masturbated regularly had fewer UTIs. Why? Because masturbation stimulates the release of cervical fluids, which helps flush out bacteria and keeps the urinary tract clean.



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Oops! I'm such a klutz!

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ENGINES READY, ATTITUDE SET

luzos, walter, david
We’re firing up the engines to start the week at full throttle. We all know Mondays can feel heavier, but it's time to suck it up, get motivated, and push through—otherwise, the week turns into an uphill battle.
So come on, shake off that sleep, because the sooner we get moving, the sooner Friday will roll around again.



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- Today I dreamed someone tried to steal my phone.
- So, what happened?
- No idea. It was all super weird.

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MORE BENEFITS YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW ABOUT

cesar, eas, javi, lucas, oscar, david
A 1994 study by the National Institutes of Health suggested that frequent ejaculation in men could be linked to a reduced risk of developing kidney stones.

The reasoning behind this theory is quite interesting: ejaculation helps flush out certain toxins and minerals that accumulate in the prostate and urinary tract. Some of these minerals are the same ones that, when crystallized, can lead to the dreaded kidney stones. In other words, maintaining an active sex life—including masturbation—could help prevent the buildup of these substances, reducing the chances of kidney stones forming.

While this doesn’t mean masturbation is a magic cure for kidney stones, it could be another piece of the puzzle for a healthy lifestyle. Paired with good hydration and a balanced diet, it might be a natural—and far more enjoyable—preventive strategy compared to other medical recommendations.



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See ya!

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MONDAYS AGAIN

walter, david
Mondays at ALRNCN are the bomb, man! It's like hitting the reset button after the weekend—clean, detoxed, fresh, and ready to soak up all the goodness. We fire up those pre-greased machines and dive headfirst into a new week, packed with killer content and epic surprises. Join the party and don't miss a beat of what we're throwing down.



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Don't let anyone or anything come between you and your daily cardio sesh.

The actress is the British babe Jasmine Jae, and in this link, you'll find a ton of her scenes




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FROM LEATHER TO SOLID GOLD: THE STORY OF THE OLISBO

javi, smm, walter, david
Long before sex toys looked anything like what we know today, women in Ancient Greece already knew how to handle things on their own. Olisbos—phallus-shaped objects made of leather, wood, ceramic, or even bread—were loyal companions when husbands went off to war. Far from being taboo, these early dildos were part of everyday life in cultures like the Greek, Roman, Egyptian, and even Chinese, often paired with simple (and effective) lubricants like olive oil.

Throughout history, the olisbo didn’t just stick around—it evolved. It showed up in plays, scandalous poems, erotic Japanese novels, and even in the private collections of European royalty. From the sex strike in Lysistrata to tortoiseshell dildos in Japan and Queen Isabella’s legendary solid gold toy, it's clear that female pleasure has always sparked creativity.

Funny how many people still think female sexual desire is some modern revelation, thanks to feminism and sexual liberation. The truth is, women have always enjoyed sex—and there were times, like in classical Greece, when they were even more sexually free than today. It’s just that, like so many things, it got buried. But history? If you dig a little, it always has something juicy to say.



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When you're the odd one out but still want to feel useful.

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