DIARY OF A WANKER

Dear diary, I can't believe how much I masturbate every day, I don't think it's normal. As much as I try not to touch myself, I can't help it. Right now I am writing these lines and I am already thinking of rubb...

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What a way to walk.

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MONDAY AT ALRNCN

javi, walter, david
Back to square one, but this time with more drive than excuses. Today’s not about being first—it’s about not standing still. Doesn’t matter if the coffee hasn’t kicked in yet or your body’s still beefing with your bed—Monday doesn’t knock, it kicks the damn door in and drops a whole week on your lap.

So no drama. No excuses. Chin up and fire up the engines. If Friday was a breeze, Monday can be your boost. The jolt. The kick you needed to finally stop putting things off. Let’s f*cking go already.

And yeah, it’s rough. I know. But you’ve gotta get moving. You’ve got more fuel than doubt and way more strength than you give yourself credit for. Come on! You’re wasting time—hit that damn START button already, it’s not gonna push itself.



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What flag is this?

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MELANCHOLY MASTURBATION

david
Back in 2021, a study published in Sexual and Relationship Therapy found that many people turn to masturbation not just for physical pleasure, but as a form of emotional self-care. Some participants said they did it to calm their anxiety, feel less alone, or reconnect with themselves during times of stress, sadness, or isolation. It’s not always about pleasure—it can also be about comfort and emotional regulation.

Melancholy masturbation. Self-love to lift the mood.



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Being the director of Human Resources isn’t exactly a walk in the park. Way too much pressure. Giving bad news, dealing with raise requests, filling vacant positions, climbing the corporate ladder…

Full scene

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WE HELP YOU UNDERSTAND

julio, walter, david
Put simply —and with a touch of philosophy— life could be seen as the sum of our personal experiences. A conscious journey where we grow, adapt, engage with our surroundings, and navigate a constant flow of emotions and connections. It’s a dynamic process, full of nuance, lessons, and interactions that shape who we are. Then again, for some people, life is just what happens between one jerk-off and the next.




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Magic.

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LIFE’S PRETTY DAMN GREAT

david
Sometimes all it takes is sticking a suction cup to the floor to realize life’s actually pretty amazing.



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No man can resist.

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STUDY BOOST

david
A 2022 study from the University of Göttingen (Germany) found that masturbation can actually improve memory retention and learning. How? Turns out orgasms activate several areas of the brain — including the hippocampus, which is directly linked to memory and information processing.

The theory is that during masturbation, the release of neurotransmitters like dopamine and oxytocin creates the perfect chemical environment to lock in knowledge and boost learning.
Basically, a good wank might do more for your grades than forcing yourself to study with a fried brain.



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Girl, cover yourself! You’re about to flash the whole world.

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MASTURBATING IS FOR HOTTIES VOL324

Back in 1994, Dr. Joycelyn Elders—an American physician and sexologist who became the first African American woman to serve as U.S. Surgeon General—sparked major controversy by suggesting that masturbation is a natural part of human sexuality and should be mentioned in sex education for young people.
Her comments stirred up a national debate and eventually led to her being forced out of her position by President Bill Clinton.

That incident shows how, even just 30 years ago, masturbation was still a taboo subject for a lot of people—and how attitudes toward it could shape public policy and education.

Has anything changed since then? I'd say hell yes.

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I'm just tired.






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