JUST USE YOUR FINGER

Fingering yourself is like snacking between meals; The best thing is to wait for the food, but if you're too hungry, why have a hard time holding back?

➡️ Let's do real, be real with Tantaly, the sex doll torso leader

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I touched him! Oh my god, I TOUCHED HIM!!!!

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THE PURITY GURUS

faisan, david
They say that if you jerk off:

• You lose strength.
• You lose confidence.
• You lose self-control.
• You can’t focus.
• You don’t succeed.
• You don’t get laid.
• You don’t sleep.
• You don’t hustle.
• Your toast burns.
• The milk boils over in the microwave.
• Your grandma cries and doesn’t even know why.

And it’s all because of jerking off.

According to some testosterone gurus, masturbation is basically a betrayal of your destiny to be great. Every time you touch yourself, Elon Musk gets richer and you get poorer. Every solo orgasm is a step further from success.
And there you are, staring at your hand, thinking all you were doing was releasing some tension, sleeping better, and avoiding the shame of sending voice notes to your ex or your crush. But nope, turns out you’re ruining your life.

Luckily, science has been saying the opposite for years: that jerking off reduces stress, helps you sleep, makes you more aware of your body, and doesn’t turn you into a weakling—it just makes you more chill and functional. But of course, that doesn’t sell self-help books or “Alpha Male 7.0” courses.

So yeah, if one day your milk overflows in the microwave, don’t blame it on jerking off. Blame it on not watching the damn thing.



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Pouty lips.

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MASTURBATING IS FOR HOTTIES VOL321

oscar, david
Back in 2009, a study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that female masturbation could actually help relieve headaches.
What’s interesting is that many women in the study didn’t avoid sex or masturbation when they had migraines—they actively sought out orgasm to ease the pain. Turns out, the endorphins released during climax work as natural painkillers.

So next time you hear the classic “not tonight, I’ve got a headache,” remember—it might actually be the perfect reason to go for it. And if anyone asks, just say you read it on ALRNCN.

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Craving summer already!

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LIFE’S PRETTY DAMN GREAT

david
Sometimes all it takes is sticking a suction cup to the floor to realize life’s actually pretty amazing.



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No man can resist.

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MASTURBATING IS FOR HOTTIES VOL324

Back in 1994, Dr. Joycelyn Elders—an American physician and sexologist who became the first African American woman to serve as U.S. Surgeon General—sparked major controversy by suggesting that masturbation is a natural part of human sexuality and should be mentioned in sex education for young people.
Her comments stirred up a national debate and eventually led to her being forced out of her position by President Bill Clinton.

That incident shows how, even just 30 years ago, masturbation was still a taboo subject for a lot of people—and how attitudes toward it could shape public policy and education.

Has anything changed since then? I'd say hell yes.

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I'm just tired.






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TRY TO KNOW YOURSELF

david
Getting to know yourself is key if you want to get anywhere in life. To figure out what you want, what you don’t, what gets you going and what holds you back. To deal with daily crap, make decisions, put up with your boss, survive family dinners… you know, the usual. And hey — masturbating in front of a mirror won’t help you find yourself, but it will definitely show you what your pussy looks like.




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Knockout.

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TANDEM JUMP

david
Some decisions come with a serious dose of vertigo. Literally. Like climbing into a tiny plane with a harness strapped to your back and an instructor hooked to you… and choosing to throw yourself into the sky from thousands of feet up.
A tandem jump isn’t just freefall—it’s about letting go, trusting the process, and being fully in the moment. For a few intense seconds, there’s no ground, no past, no future. Just the wind on your face, your heart racing, and the feeling that you're doing something you'll never forget.

Some do it for the adrenaline rush, others to cross it off their bucket list. But almost everyone lands with a big smile—and one hell of a story to tell.



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Gender reveal.

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