THE HOHLE FELS DILDO

walter, david
walter, david
The "Hohle Fels Dildo" is an artifact carved from limonite stone, found in a cave in Germany, and estimated to be around 28,000 years old. Measuring about 20 centimeters in length, its phallic shape, rounded ends, and carefully polished finish have led archaeologists to conclude that it was used as a prehistoric dildo, making it one of the oldest known sex toys.





The hypothesis about its sexual use is based on several factors. Its design is clearly anatomical, with human-like proportions and a smooth finish, suggesting it wasn’t used as a functional tool. Additionally, wear marks on specific areas reinforce the idea that it was handled repeatedly. To top it off, the context of the discovery supports this interpretation: the same cave housed other fertility-related artifacts, such as the famous Venus of Hohle Fels, indicating that such objects had symbolic or personal significance at the time.

This discovery not only reveals the ancient origins of sexual artifacts but also shows how they were integrated into the daily lives and beliefs of our ancestors. A fascinating piece of history that connects the past to the present in humanity’s pursuit of pleasure and sexual expression.

➡️ Let's do real, be real with Tantaly, the sex doll torso leader

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Where’s Natasha? Has anyone seen Natasha? Can someone explain why she isn’t here already?

The model Irina Meier dressed as Natasha Romanoff (Black Widow)
instagram.com/irine_meier


If you’re wondering whether there are any nude pictures of her—yes, there are.





Though, to be honest, I think they’re all fake, or at least the ones I’ve checked out. I don’t know, my Spidey sense tells me they’re probably not real. Sorry to be the one to break it to you.




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STUDY BOOST

david
A 2022 study from the University of Göttingen (Germany) found that masturbation can actually improve memory retention and learning. How? Turns out orgasms activate several areas of the brain — including the hippocampus, which is directly linked to memory and information processing.

The theory is that during masturbation, the release of neurotransmitters like dopamine and oxytocin creates the perfect chemical environment to lock in knowledge and boost learning.
Basically, a good wank might do more for your grades than forcing yourself to study with a fried brain.



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Girl, cover yourself! You’re about to flash the whole world.

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THE MIRROR IS A DAMN LIAR

luzos, oscar, walter, david
The classic Snow White tale revolves around a magic mirror that always tells the truth about who's the fairest of them all. But now, with the new version starring Rachel Zegler as Snow White and Gal Gadot as the Evil Queen, everything goes straight to hell. Why? Because the mirror dares to claim Rachel is hotter than Gal—which literally no one believes. If there's one thing all guys worldwide agree on, it's that Gal Gadot is easily a thousand times sexier than Rachel Zegler.



So, how the hell does this happen? Here’s where the supposed philosophical symbolism kicks in: the mirror doesn't just measure physical beauty; it also values purity, goodness, and inner beauty. According to that logic, Rachel comes out ahead because she's supposedly got something Gal Gadot lacks in the film: a nobler, less envy-corrupted soul.

Bullshit! If Rachel Zegler has proven anything in recent months, it’s precisely how toxic, arrogant, and poisoned by cheap feminism her soul really is—oozing pretentiousness and superiority from every pore of her body.

The ideological trainwreck Disney has become in recent years finally hit rock bottom by casting someone like her to reboot one of the iconic stories from our childhood.

Therefore, I'm officially revoking all magical powers from that mirror, demoting it on behalf of the patriarchy, and hereby relegating its sole purpose to reflecting and holding suction cups.



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¡Que te jodan, Mickey Mouse!

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MASTURBATING IS FOR HOTTIES VOL321

oscar, david
Back in 2009, a study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that female masturbation could actually help relieve headaches.
What’s interesting is that many women in the study didn’t avoid sex or masturbation when they had migraines—they actively sought out orgasm to ease the pain. Turns out, the endorphins released during climax work as natural painkillers.

So next time you hear the classic “not tonight, I’ve got a headache,” remember—it might actually be the perfect reason to go for it. And if anyone asks, just say you read it on ALRNCN.

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Craving summer already!

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MELANCHOLY MASTURBATION

david
Back in 2021, a study published in Sexual and Relationship Therapy found that many people turn to masturbation not just for physical pleasure, but as a form of emotional self-care. Some participants said they did it to calm their anxiety, feel less alone, or reconnect with themselves during times of stress, sadness, or isolation. It’s not always about pleasure—it can also be about comfort and emotional regulation.

Melancholy masturbation. Self-love to lift the mood.



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Being the director of Human Resources isn’t exactly a walk in the park. Way too much pressure. Giving bad news, dealing with raise requests, filling vacant positions, climbing the corporate ladder…

Full scene

Starring Rachel RoXXX and Skyla Novea. Here are some links if you want to check out more of their scenes:

Videos of Rachel RoXXX

Videos of Skyla Novea




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ENGINES READY, ATTITUDE SET

luzos, walter, david
We’re firing up the engines to start the week at full throttle. We all know Mondays can feel heavier, but it's time to suck it up, get motivated, and push through—otherwise, the week turns into an uphill battle.
So come on, shake off that sleep, because the sooner we get moving, the sooner Friday will roll around again.



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- Today I dreamed someone tried to steal my phone.
- So, what happened?
- No idea. It was all super weird.

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MINDFULNESS AND MASTURBATION

luzos, smm, david
Mindful masturbation is a different approach to pleasuring yourself, where you focus entirely on the physical sensations you're experiencing, without relying on fantasies, images, or external stimuli like videos or memories.

It might sound a bit strange at first since most of us are used to masturbating with some kind of fantasy or visual stimulation in mind. But with mindful masturbation, the goal is to fully enjoy the immediate pleasure by concentrating exclusively on your sensations, without rushing or getting distracted.

But can you actually reach orgasm without fantasies? The short answer is yes, although it might seem tricky at first. Direct physical stimulation alone—without mental images or external stimuli—can absolutely lead you to orgasm. In fact, many people who've tried this method say their orgasms are noticeably different: deeper, more intense, and more satisfying because they're fully connected to what's happening in their bodies, without distractions.



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Going all in.

Meet Amia Miley, and click this link to enjoy many of her scenes.




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