MASTURBATING IS FOR HOTTIES VOL323Back in the Renaissance, some doctors already understood what we now consider basic common sense: if unrequited love is driving you mad, maybe what you need isn’t poetry — it’s a good old-fashioned wank.
They called it “amorous melancholy,” and it was basically a kind of depression triggered by pent-up desire. And yes, some physicians actually recommended releasing the tension as a way to avoid going off the rails. Ejaculating as therapy. Literally. They didn’t say it that bluntly, but between the lines, what they were prescribing was sex — and then moving on with your life.
Guided by the theory of humors (from Hippocrates and Galen), they believed imbalances in bodily fluids like bile, blood, or even semen could mess with both your physical and mental health.
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Girolamo Mercuriale (1530–1606)an Italian physician and author of De Morbis Cutaneis and De Morbo Gallico, didn’t talk about masturbation directly, but he did suggest that prolonged sexual abstinence could cause illness — and that sex (or a release) could be therapeutic.
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André Du Laurens (1558–1609), a French doctor, openly discussed amorous melancholy in his work Discours de la conservation de la vue… and recommended sex or ejaculation to restore emotional balance.
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Juan Huarte de San Juan (1529–1588), a Spanish physician and author of Examen de Ingenios, connected unsatisfied sexual desire with mental and emotional instability. He didn’t mention masturbation explicitly either, but made it clear that release was necessary for emotional stability — especially in those with an excess of “heat” or desire.
So yes, masturbation was seen as a way to treat romantic despair in the Renaissance. The idea of jerking off so you don’t lose your mind over heartbreak? It’s right there in the old medical texts.
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FROM LEATHER TO SOLID GOLD: THE STORY OF THE OLISBOjavi, smm, walter, david
Long before sex toys looked anything like what we know today, women in Ancient Greece already knew how to handle things on their own. Olisbos—phallus-shaped objects made of leather, wood, ceramic, or even bread—were loyal companions when husbands went off to war. Far from being taboo, these early dildos were part of everyday life in cultures like the Greek, Roman, Egyptian, and even Chinese, often paired with simple (and effective) lubricants like olive oil.
Throughout history, the olisbo didn’t just stick around—it evolved. It showed up in plays, scandalous poems, erotic Japanese novels, and even in the private collections of European royalty. From the sex strike in Lysistrata to tortoiseshell dildos in Japan and Queen Isabella’s legendary solid gold toy, it's clear that female pleasure has always sparked creativity.
Funny how many people still think female sexual desire is some modern revelation, thanks to feminism and sexual liberation. The truth is, women have always enjoyed sex—and there were times, like in classical Greece, when they were even more sexually free than today. It’s just that, like so many things, it got buried. But history? If you dig a little, it always has something juicy to say.
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When you're the odd one out but still want to feel useful.