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Published on 2015/07/06
YOU CAN'T MAKE LOVE HERE
They thought nobody could see them, but the security cameras were filming everything and a patrol was going to them in order to stop their rapture of love.
Motherfuckers. The security guards I mean. Why couldn't let them finish? Even hunters do that!
ExtraBall
If you feel uncomfortable when his knee touches yours because of the lack of space... imagine living an experience like this.
I'M AN OLD-FASHIONED GUY, AS SOME WOULD SAY
I invite you for a snack, a stroll in the park, whisper sweet things in your ear, and go down on you—all on the first date. And if that bothers you, we can go Dutch on the snack.
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ExtraBall by david
Monique Gabrielle - Evil Toons (1992)
Monique Gabrielle - Bachelor Party (1984)
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WHAT LOVE CAN DO
walter
When you're deeply in love, you can feel such a strong connection with your partner that the surrounding environment and the attention of others take a back seat. This can result in more authentic behaviors, less influenced by social expectations. I mean, you start with a kiss and end up breaking their ass on the balcony in front of everyone.
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Glitch in the Matrix.
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MOM, I SAW YOU WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND IN THE BACKYARD
When you're trying to rebuild your life after the divorce but you think it's still too early to bring your new boyfriend home and introduce him to your kids.
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Having sex on the motorcycle.
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CHEAP EXCUSES
david
When she stopped you on the street and asked for the name of a street, alarms went off. Who asks for street names today when everyone has a smartphone that can Google things? "This girl wants something", you thought, and yes, you were right. It was all an excuse to eat your dick. I can't believe the things that women do to get their way.
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The psychiatrist: The ninja chinchilla does not exist, it is an unfounded fear.
The ninja chinchilla:
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Contact
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NEGOTIATING THE PRICE
When you meet someone on the street to give them something you sold through one of those second-hand buying/selling apps, and you proceed to renegotiate the price.
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The slow motion of the day.
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WE HAVE BOTH TRIUMPHED
Few things can unite people (and feel personally satisfactory) as much as going out with your best friend on a night out and ending up having sex with a couple of girls in the parking lot of the nightclub.
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Damn it, Matrix!
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